Actually, I had given up….knowing that I would be single forever…
…It was very lonely and I did NOT enjoy it at all…everywhere you go, there are couples..no one is alone in this world… I had finally surrendered and was staying true to my God…he had saved me many times… I had told him I would do anything he wanted me to do…I would go anywhere he wanted me to go…just tell me when and where…
Friends had told me to try ‘Christian Mingle’, a website to find the perfect Christian for you… So, I signed up and all I saw was body parts and ungodliness…It was pretty sad..I then signed up for 1 month of ‘E-Harmony’…and reached out to several, but got no response what so ever… I winked at this one girl about a thousand times, but was ignored by her just as everyone else…Something told me I should try winking at her once more…so I did…
She winked back! Wow….someone actually responded…. Her profile described just the person I was looking for… Godly, Christ-like, etc.. We exchanged a few questions on that day, and I gave her my phone number…she called me within 15 minutes….we talked for hours that night….and every night after that…
You need to know….that …on the site you are able to have ‘filters’ ….she had filters in place for distance..she didn’t want anyone over 50 miles from her to be able to reach out to her….she also had a filter in place to block smokers… Well, I smoked 2 packs per day, and I was about 200 miles away… That is how God works….. filters….. That means nothing to Him! LOL We shouldn't have been able to connect, according to the filters on the site!
He, (GOD), gave me the most amazing gift a man could ever have….. A Beautiful, God Loving Wife! I love her with all my heart…. I think of her in my sleep, and when I wake she is the first thing on my mind…as I work, I think of her and how blessed I am…..on the way home to her, I can’t wait to simply be in the same room with her… smitten…. hehe… I love her so much! and…it is soooo exciting to walk this amazing journey with her by my side…..
I had always dreamed of having a husband and a family but the dream had always eluded me. While at times I doubted it would ever happen, I still held out hope and prayed for the one that God was preparing for me. At times, I hoped God would move more at my speed but now know that His timing is perfect, and wouldn’t have had it any other way.
Over the years of waiting, I would watch friends become couples and get married. As one by one this happened, I would rejoice with them while my heart was breaking on the inside. You see, I was so alone and didn’t understand why no one wanted me. Well meaning people would say that I was not going to the right places (places I was not comfortable going to) to meet someone, or that I just needed to be patient. The final statement that made me try something new was “You need to accept the fact you are destined to be alone.” Who says that to someone??
So, I signed up for E-Harmony. I remember filling out my profile truthfully and honestly even though others said I was crazy to do so. I didn’t want to lie about who I was. I wanted someone who was interested in me. It is funny how God works! when I got the wink from John, I was so excited (he says he had winked several times before I responded) I couldn’t wait for lunch that day to respond. From that moment on I was more bold than I have ever been in my life. He asked me if we could talk and gave me his number. I actually called him….this shy and timid woman, called him….where did that come from? The next night we talked about meeting that weekend but his car wasn’t working well and I offered to drive to where he was, yet another bold move for me. I am not impulsive,so where did that come from?…when I met him that weekend, he gave me hug and I knew in that instance that I was home. I am not sure if that makes sense but I knew that I had just met my husband, the one that God had intended for me all along!
When I went back to work that Monday morning, I was interviewing for a new position at work and I boldly told my supervisor that while I wanted to interview for the position, was it possible to hold the position and work form Little Rock, you see my sweet John was 3 1/2 hours away. I even asked that they start working on transferring me to Little Rock. I remember laughing and crying when I spoke of John, I still do to this day. I would Rush home every evening after work just to talk to him on the phone. The days of working late just to fill the emptiness were over. I wanted to be on the phone with him. I hated when weekends ended as I had to be away from him.
Finally the day came that we could be together, I was finally going to be his forever. The day I said those vows I cried for the shear emotion and love that I feel for this man. You see God knew my heart more better than I knew it and knew exactly what I needed and when. It still amazes me that God loved me so much that He would fulfill the desires of my heart with this amazing man. I love him more than the day I married him and I could not imagine my life without him. He makes me want to be a better person. He laughs with me and holds me and wipes away the tears when they fall.
I look forward to continuing this love journey with my sweet John and seeing what our God has in store for us. This journey of love is a great blessing!